Today I took back to the library a wonderful book I’d barely begun: Commonwealth, by Ann Patchett. When I went to hear her talk at the library a few months ago, she said this is the most autobiographical of her books so far. So I got it out and started to read. She’s a terrific writer, vivid and imaginative, and I marvelled as I read the few pages I read about the depth of her research, how she came to know all those arcane facts – the jargon of policemen in L.A., for example. And how richly she inhabits the inner lives of her characters.
But then I realized – I am just not interested in a fictionalization of her true life experience. In how a writer takes her own life and transforms it, weaves it fancifully into fiction. Life is too short; there isn’t time for me to follow the made-up journey of her made-up characters, no matter how well they’re written. I want to read the truth, written as the truth.
So I took it back and instead got out the two books the library was holding for me: All the single ladies, by Rebecca Traister, and So Sad Today, essays by Melissa Broder. I don’t know if I’ll finish these either, but they’re my speed. My thing. A voice speaking directly to me, as herself, about her life and thoughts. If I don’t finish these, and even if I do, I’ll also finish The Hidden Life of Trees and wait for two more compilations of essays I’ve ordered from the library that are on their way – Upstream, by the wonderful Mary Oliver, and a Christmas book by Jeanette Winterson – plus the others below.
| OUTSTANDING HOLDS | ||||||||||||||||||
|
|
||||||||||||||||||
 Title |
Position | Pickup at | Expires | Status | ||||||||||||||
|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|
| Select All | ||||||||||||||||||
| 300 reasons to love New York | 1 of 6 | Parliament Street | 1/12/2018 | Active | ||||||||||||||
| Frantumaglia : a writer’s journey | 123 of 131 | Parliament Street | 1/12/2018 | Active | ||||||||||||||
| Hot milk | 46 of 74 | Parliament Street | 1/12/2018 | Active | ||||||||||||||
| The lonely city : adventures in the art of being alone | 85 of 121 | Parliament Street | 11/12/2018 | Active | ||||||||||||||
| Medical medium life-changing foods : save yourself and the ones you love with the hidden healing powers of fruits and vegetables | 58 of 63 | Parliament Street | 12/12/2018 | Active | ||||||||||||||
| Moonglow | 100 of 334 | Par | ||||||||||||||||
Treasure, no?
Spent my morning delving into my diaries for material for my own truth. As I’ve written before, it’s a kind of horrifying gift to be able to hear and see your own very young self so clearly. When I was 16, I was raging because I hated how my father, whom I called Generalissimo, ordered me around and was condescending and authoritarian. And then I read how, at 24, I hate the director I’m working for because he orders me around and is condescending and authoritarian.
Could it be any clearer?
Very cold and icy here. Hunkering is called for, and hunkering I shall do. With books.
Doing the dishes two Christmasses ago:
