My new book “Midlife Solo” will be published by Mosaic Press later this year. Stay tuned!

Beth Kaplan logo

cute but dumb

Annals of idiocy, local division: no, this isn’t about Rob Ford, for once, nor about Stephen Harper or the Tea Party. It’s about moi. As you may know, I have a Master’s degree. Yes, it’s in Creative Writing so not terribly useful in the day to day – though very helpful when it comes to editing my friend’s books, as I’ve just started to do for Chris in Vancouver. But to continue – I am fairly well-educated, I’ve travelled, I’m a sensible person who always pays her Visa bill in full before the due date and manages to run a big old house and maintain a teaching schedule.

What I cannot do is figure out how things work. And yesterday was particularly humiliating. I use a French press coffee maker, and as I was cleaning the plunger, it came apart. So I washed the parts, and then had to reassemble them. Six parts – a stem, four different round bits with holes in the middle, and a silver dohickey. Well, do you think I could figure out which went where? Eventually, of course, I turned to Google and was enraged – there were pictures of the assembled plungers but no INSTRUCTIONS WITH DIAGRAMS in how they go together.
It took me half an hour. I kid you not. Embarrassing. Not nearly as embarrassing, though, as the time when I was trying to frame a picture and told my father-in-law that the glass didn’t fit any more – it must have shrunk. He showed me that I was putting it in the wrong way.
Look, I’m gorgeous, brilliant, hilarious and amazing in almost every way, a mix, I like to think, of Doris Lessing and the Dalai Lama. And also, sometimes, a moron. You just can’t have it all.



One response to “cute but dumb”

  1. coach outlet says:

    It’s an amazing blog.This was a very well-written and enjoyable post to read.Thanks for the info sharing with us.

Leave a Reply

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *

About Beth

I began keeping a journal at the age of nine. Nearly fifty years later, I started this online journal, sharing reflections, reviews, updates, and the occasional secret.

Some Blogs I Follow

Chris Walks
This blog evolves. It once was about travels. Now it’s a reason to be at the keyboard that I value.

Theresa Kishkan
Theresa Kishkan is a writer living on the Sechelt Peninsula on the west coast of Canada.

Juliet in Paris
I came to Paris in the 1990s. Decades later I’m still here. Come with me while I roam the city, the country, and beyond.

Walking Woman
I walk on. With my feet, and in my mind as well.

Carrie Snyder
Wherever you’ve come from, wherever you’re going, consider this space a place for reflection and pause.


Coming soon

A new book by Beth Kaplan, published by Mosaic Press – “Midlife Solo”

Join the mailing list to stay up to date on this and other exciting news.

"*" indicates required fields

This field is for validation purposes and should be left unchanged.