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benign is the right word

Okay, I do not live in a permanent state of rapture; sometimes the world gets me down. The Republican convention is getting me down. Just the thought of a man that vile being granted power and prestige is enough to make me vomit, let alone the whole Republican platform – a cavalcade of racist stupidity – and everyone there. Who are those people? I know, I asked that when Rob Ford was elected, and yet there he was, for years. Scared angry white people dreaming of a mythical past.

And then the murders continue, and what’s happening in Turkey …

But also, I am just back from the beautiful new Women’s College Hospital, where my left breast came in for some serious consideration – two mammograms and then an ultrasound. The technician went to show the pictures to the radiologist, who then appeared herself to take a closer look. That was when I got a tiny bit scared. She explained that there’s something, probably a benign cyst but they want to keep an eye on it, I’ll be called back in six months.

So – no news is sort of good news, but I did leave feeling immensely vulnerable. So many little bits, inside and out, to go wrong. I remember my father, dying of cancer at 65, saying, “I don’t regret anything, I’ve been blessed.”

Me too.

Perhaps I should just not read the newspaper this week.

Time to water the garden.



2 Responses to “benign is the right word”

  1. theresa says:

    So much to worry about, globally. Not to mention south of the border. But it must feel such a relief to know you probably have a cyst rather than the other alternatives…Enjoy your garden.

  2. beth says:

    Yes, it's a relief, and also that they're going to keep a close eye on it. But I find it hard these days not to be a bit depressed about the state of the world. The words "hell in a handbasket" come to mind …

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About Beth

I began keeping a journal at the age of nine. Nearly fifty years later, I started this online journal, sharing reflections, reviews, updates, and the occasional secret.

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