My new book “Midlife Solo” is now available.

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Monday visit, Globes, Jobs and Bowie

Newly learned game with my grandson: He knocks on my back. “Knock knock,” he says. “Who’s there?” I say. “Eli,” he says. “Eli who?” I say. Slight pause. “Eli,” he says. We played that for quite a while.

“There’s seals under my bed,” he says. “They only come out when it’s bedtime.”

Lucky lucky Glamma. The hurricane family came to visit today, and though my house was trashed when they left, it was beyond wonderful to see them.

Here’s another kind of beauty that tugs at my heart:

Brad and Ryan – little old Canadian Ryan, more than holding his own with a superstar – at the Golden Globes. Mmmm – Mr. Pitt is getting better looking as he ages, as some men and almost no women, SO UNFAIRLY, do. (Has he had work? Is not that brow supremely smooth for a father of six or however many they have? Gosling is nearly 20 years younger and looks the same age!) A crowd gathered here last night to watch Downton and some of the Globes before and after. After an hour or so of awards, I was thrilled to turn it off and go to bed, grateful the show has saved me hours of time – after last night, I’ve resolved never to watch the Oscars again. I thought Ricky Gervais was horrible (though sometimes funny), the speeches mostly inane, the whole thing lame, self-serving and faintly disgusting. Except for an occasional glimpse of a beautiful man or two, like these two and classy Brits like Eddie Redmayne and Mark Rylance – and beautiful Helen Mirren – it was a complete waste of time. And anyway, I disagreed with most of the awards and hadn’t seen or heard of the others, maybe that’s why I was so crabby. Anyway, enough. Who cares? Hollywood, just do your job and shut up.

The other night, a documentary on Apple’s Steve Jobs – I didn’t see it all but what I did see was shocking. I’d heard rumours before but hadn’t heard details of what an unpleasant human being he could be – a brilliant, overbearing bully who was worth millions when he reluctantly agreed to pay $500 a month child support for his daughter – and worse, the devious, tax-evading corporate citizen that Apple, unlike Microsoft, continues to be. Almost made me want to trade in my Mac. Almost. But not quite. Please don’t make me do it – I love this thing. It can’t help who its father was. Jobs did do good in the world, creating this fantastic stuff, even if he was flawed. And aren’t we all. But the tax avoidance is unforgivable, especially when compared with what Bill Gates has done with his billions.

I thought I’d be preparing for my first class at Ryerson tonight and at U of T tomorrow, but not till next week. A whole week more to sort out my life and get my own work done: a gift from the universe, which also provided a mighty cold day today. I’m grateful I don’t have to go anywhere tonight. But the cold didn’t bother a small young man this afternoon, who went outside joyfully to eat snow.

P.S. I feel I should comment about David Bowie, who died this morning, but I’m not sure what to say. The immediate outpouring of love and respect has shown me that I missed something important, but the fact is, I was not a fan. I wasn’t a NON-fan, but his chameleon style, his androgyny and costumes just never hooked me, not remotely. Perhaps it’s because he came into prominence in the Seventies when I was an actor unsure of my career and eventually trying to get out, trying to become my honest and real self rather than wearing costumes and makeup, so I just was not interested in a musician, however talented, who was constantly trying on new personae.

He was amazingly good at what he did, and I just saw his last video, Lazarus, which is mesmerizing and very brave. He was always mesmerizing and very brave, and I’m sorry I didn’t open to him.

So young – 69. And so very well read.



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About Beth

I began keeping a journal at the age of nine. Nearly fifty years later, I started this online journal, sharing reflections, reviews, updates, and the occasional secret.

Some Blogs I Follow

Chris Walks
This blog evolves. It once was about travels. Now it’s a reason to be at the keyboard that I value.

Theresa Kishkan
Theresa Kishkan is a writer living on the Sechelt Peninsula on the west coast of Canada.

I walk on. With my feet, and in my mind as well.

Carrie Snyder
Wherever you’ve come from, wherever you’re going, consider this space a place for reflection and pause.


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