I am trembling. I spent some time yesterday writing and rewriting an email, read it to friends, left it 24 hours, read it to my daughter, just sent it.
There’s been a huge injustice in my neighbourhood; a vulnerable elderly woman is being evicted from her longterm basement suite, which she’d been promised she could stay in until her landlady’s death. The whole house was recently bought by a new landlord, who is allowing the former owner to stay but has evicted my friend; she was given a few months to find another place and get out. She used to help her landlady with her dogs and her garden; they were friends, until the landlady, a difficult woman, turned against her. I’ve been involved in trying to help her find a new place she can afford, which in this city, as we all know, is almost impossible. She is a cancer survivor, has a cat, no family, very little money, has been frantic for months. It’s heartrending.
And then I discovered that the man who bought the landlady’s house and threw out her tenant advertises himself on his work website as a committed social activist, proud of taking care of the elderly and vulnerable among the city’s LGBT community. Fury boiled.
So despite some trepidation, I wrote and sent this, names excised here:
I am a longtime friend of X and once, though no longer, of Y. I have followed the appalling way X has been treated by you both with horror and sorrow. It says on your company website that you are “reaching out to Canada’s aging LGBT community to create a safe environment to assess the needs of this under-served population and bringing homophobia, gay-friendly housing and outreach to the forefront of social activism.”
P.S. Much shit has hit the fan; several emails have come burning back, and I’ve replied. This has taken the better part of a day. But I really don’t think I had a choice. Do you?
5 Responses to “bearing witness, taking sides”
You did the right thing, the moral thing. It's never easy, though. But that woman is lucky to have you as a neighbour.
Thank you, Theresa. I hesitate to wade into these things, my heart pounding, and sure enough, as I wrote, the back and forth of emails has absorbed the day. But it wasn't just the injustice to X, it was the hypocrisy of boasting about caring for the vulnerable – just made me furious. Ah well. The storm has subsided, and she's still looking for a place to live.
Good on you Beth. I dislike mean and nasty people, I HATE mean and nasty people who pretend to be nice and caring people! You go for it girl!
Ginette
I agree, you have to stand up and say something! Good on you Beth.There are some great supports thru Fred Victor if your friend is interested. https://www.fredvictor.org/what-we-do/housing/housing-access-and-support-services/ I can also send you some more agency supports if you think it would help! I miss you and the group, hopefully I will see you soon when the dust clears from my 1st floor.
Laura
Thanks Ginette and Laura for support and practical advice. I will pass on to my friend. Yes, exactly, it's bad enough when people treat others badly, but worse when they pretend to be kind-hearted philanthropists – and actually think of themselves as such. The man concerned absolutely 100% did not get what my note was about and thinks of himself as innocent. But maybe a bit of doubt and decency will lodge in a corner of his brain. Don't hold your breath.